


Things I Should Have Said

by itsabrandnewday



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 18:43:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1047292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsabrandnewday/pseuds/itsabrandnewday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Felicity and Oliver need to figure out how to work together after Russia.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things I Should Have Said

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so yet another therapy session. This one got away from me. Wasn't sure where it was going. Have all these thoughts and dialogue ideas. Incorporated some. Others might show up later.

It had been a month since they’d returned from Russia. Things were strained but Team Arrow was still functioning as a unit, although there was less brevity on the executive floor of QC and in the basement of Verdant.

Oliver knew it was his fault. Part of him wanted to take back what had happened in Russia with Isobel. The other half wanted to take back his words to Felicity. He wanted a second chance at both situations to make the right decisions.

The hurdle Oliver knew was that impulsive decisions showed the character of a person. When planned his actions benefited people, if he acted on a whim he tended to hurt the people who cared about him. This further enforced his stance on avoiding relationships with women he could and did care about.

However, he needed to fix things with Felicity. She continued to act as his Executive Assistant. She showed up daily and performed all her tasks. She left QC at night and showed up at Verdant and performed all her tasks. She responded when spoken to and spoke up when she had information that needed to be shared. She was silent otherwise.

Oliver didn’t know how to apologize to her. He couldn’t tell her that he would rather have been in her bed. He wished he could spend hours in her bed physically pleasing her. The encounter with Isobel had been rushed and Oliver wouldn’t have had it any other way. Isobel’s dress had hit the floor and Oliver’s pants had followed. Her underwear had remained on as had his shirt. He felt more comfortable screwing her when his history wasn’t bared on his body for her to see. She didn’t get to know him that intimately.

From his seat at his desk, Oliver could watch everything Felicity did. She’d lean forward when she spotted something she didn’t like in her email. She’d squint at it until she was convinced the information hadn’t changed. If she was working on a Team Arrow project, she’d slip into her hacking face. It quickly disappeared if the elevators opened admitting anyone to the executive floor.

It was Tuesday which meant in just a few minutes Sadie would join Felicity for lunch. The short brunette with bright blue highlights in her spiked hair was a former co-worker in the IT department. Oliver would never go so far as to stereotype someone given his history with being stereotyped. However, if he had been asked which girl looked more the part of an IT professional, he would have chosen Sadie. Everything about her screamed that she spent more time with computers than friends. Felicity on the other hand was the bubbly type who Oliver would have thought would have more friends than computers. However, only Sadie ever ventured to this level to eat lunch with Felicity.

The elevators chimed and Sadie walked off. It was like clockwork. For safety the elevators were only permitted to this floor through security or through Felicity. Oliver always knew the moment that Felicity overrode the security feature. Her entire demeanor relaxed and a genuine smile began to settle on her face. Before Russia Oliver didn’t notice; since Russia Oliver looked forward to Tuesdays as much as Felicity did. He needed to see that smile on her face.

John Diggle exited the elevator behind Sadie. Holding the door open for her, he placed the lunch he’d picked up for the two girls on the coffee table between the couches of the waiting room. The bag in his other hand was brought into Oliver’s office.

“Lunch?” The simple way in which Oliver and John communicated was a welcome respite from how Oliver had to deal with just about everyone else. Brothers in arms left them with a familiarity that didn’t need too many additional words.

Oliver joined him at the table near the windows that overlooked the city. He always sat with his back to Merlyn Global. Digg took up the seat across from him and they settled in to eat.

Ten minutes into lunch and Oliver found his eyes were almost plastered to the glass separating his office from Felicity’s space. The girls were laughing exuberantly about something. Digg had turned a couple of times to check it out but nothing indicated what they found so funny.

Felicity’s desk phone rang and after three rings it rolled to voice mail. It rang immediately after again and Felicity’s laughter gentled but she didn’t move to her desk. The third time it rang she moved to answer it. She answered it and immediately she slid back into business mode. She never said another word before she hung up the phone. Turning to Sadie, she offered what Oliver assumed was an apology and made her way to the elevators with her access card in hand. If Oliver hadn’t been watching so closely he might have missed the hands that were curled into fists.

Curious he walked out to the outer office. Sadie looked him over when he stopped by the couches.

“Where did Felicity go?”

“Are you kidding me? You too? Employees are allowed a lunch break. There is actually a law about it, if you want to look it up.” Sadie rolled her eyes at him before turning back to her sandwich.

“Sadie, I am well aware of the employment laws. I’m asking where Felicity went.”

“The bathroom.” Sadie popped a fry in her mouth and met his gaze.

“She usually doesn’t get upset when she goes to the bathroom.” Oliver was a bit amazed at the spitfire across from him. He didn’t think she was being malicious but he was used to employees immediately giving him what he wanted. Most employees were scared of him. He didn’t flaunt the fact but he knew it.

“Do you really care or are you just worried there won’t be time for a noon quickie?” Sadies plump fingers gestured towards his office.

“Excuse me?” Now Oliver was a bit curious who this girl thought she was. Although Oliver recognized a bit of Felicity’s fire in her, she was pretty much the opposite of Felicity. Felicity was thin with long fingers and a proclivity to blush when she said something she didn’t mean to. Sadie clearly let whatever she was thinking fly and she had no sign of a blush.

“You certainly aren’t Felicity’s normal type. I’m  not sure how you conned her into your bed, but I would have hoped you would respect her enough to let her go before you took up with another QC employee.”

Oliver wasn’t sure what to say to that.

“Ya know. Felicity’s idea of foreplay is hours spent working through code or fixing a computer most in IT would have buried. Her type of guy would sit on the couch with her on Saturdays and watch a marathon of Dr. Who or even watch Sharknado with her. When she left IT every male in the department wept. Hell some of your executives wept because they wouldn’t get to ogle and grope her anymore. Felicity is a genius in a trophy wife’s body. Don’t treat her like a trophy wife just because she looks good in a skirt.”

The elevator chimed and Felicity came back in carrying an armful of folders. She looked between Oliver and Sadie as she placed them on her desk.

“Mr. Queen, did you need something?”

Her voice snapped Oliver’s eyes back up to her face. When she’d walked off the elevator Oliver had taken the time to assess her attire. There was nothing inappropriate about it, but the body underneath gave it a splash of sex appeal.

“No, I was just greeting Sadie. Always nice to speak to QC employees and get their feedback on how QC is developing. Enjoy your lunch, ladies.” Oliver retreated to his office and ignored the questions on Digg’s face.

 

An hour later Oliver wrapped up an impromptu meeting with Isobel. Felicity stood near his desk while he signed a  bunch of forms for her to mail.

“Where did you go during lunch?” He had a good idea, but he wanted to see what she’d say.

“Ms. Rochev called so I went to pick these up. They needed your signature by the end of the day.” Felicity took back the signed ones and slid a few more in front of him.

“Why didn’t you wait until you and Sadie were done with lunch to go get them?” Oliver had a suspicion but he needed Felicity to voice it to him.

“Ms. Rochev said it was time-sensitive and took priority over anything else.” Felicity gathered the last of them and made to leave his office.

“Felicity?”

“No, Oliver, no. I can’t talk about this. Because I don’t know if I’ll burst into tears or say something that I mean but will regret later on. I am doing the job of your executive assistant and this is part of that job.” Felicity didn’t turn to face him.

“Why don’t you take your lunch in the cafeteria so you don’t hear your phone?”

Felicity spun around to face him. Her face was a mix of emotions. He saw pain, incredulity, and some resignation.

“I can’t eat in the cafeteria because everyone believes I am sleeping with you. I walk in and the entire place shuts up before they take to talking about a bit more quietly than before. There are bets on how long it will be until I am back in IT because you tire of me. There are bets as to whether or not I’ll be fired or you’ll demote me. There are now rumors that I’m a bisexual and had a threesome with you and Isobel in Russia. As if I’d ever let her close enough to touch me. I’d probably lose a limb to hypothermia instantaneously.” Felicity threw a hand over her mouth essentially shutting herself up.

“Will you please sit down and talk to me, Felicity?” Oliver stood from his desk but she stepped away from him towards the door.

“I can’t, Oliver. Please.”

“Felicity, I need to know so I can fix this.” He indicated the chair but didn’t move closer to her.

“You can’t fix it. You can’t fire anyone who has ever speculated about what you and I do up here. You can’t set them straight that we aren’t sleeping together and you’re sleeping with Ms. Rochev. They don’t understand so they’ll gossip. I am doing my best to deal with it.”

“You don’t have to deal with it alone.”

The papers she held hit his desk and the top few slid to the floor. She fell into the chair farthest from him. He moved back to his chair so he could see her face.

“I am alone.”

Oliver opened his mouth to refute her statement but she took a breath and kept going.

“When I arrived at the hotel in Russia, Ms. Rochev was already checked in. She was headed to the elevator but stopped me. She wanted to know where you were. I told her what you’d told me about  getting a drink with Digg. She then said to me, ‘get used to being left behind, Felicity. Soon enough Oliver won’t need you anymore and you’ll be alone. Then you’ll have a choice to make. It’ll be the IT department or resignation for you.’ So you see Oliver I just have to deal with it. I won’t give her the satisfaction of driving me to the IT department. I won’t resign either because as much as I might not like QC right now, I believe in what we do after hours.”

The pain in his stomach grew as Oliver realized Isobel had played both he and Felicity. Something which had meant nothing to him was a game to her; a game that meant something to Felicity because she’d been a player against her wishes.

“Felicity, I wish you had told me.”

“Told you what? People are gossiping on every floor below us? Brett Collins is upset because I never accepted his advances even though he has two kids and a wife at home? There is a rather large sum of money going to be paid to the person who gambles right on which one of us throws in the towel first. BTW there is more money on you tiring of me than there is on me losing the stars in my eyes for you.” She swiped a lone tear off her cheek.

“I wish you’d told about Isobel.” Oliver wanted to wrap her up in his arms and chase away the obvious pain she was in.

“There wasn’t anything to tell. The crap she has been spewing since she showed up here hasn’t changed. I’m a slut who slept my way up to a position that is a demotion in my eyes only apparently. I’m not enough to keep you from having sex with other women. I’m at her beck and call because she is a partner.”

Isobel had destroyed everything he admired in Felicity. Although by sleeping with Isobel, Oliver had only given her more power to annihilate her.

“I’m going to head home. I am getting a headache and I need a nap before I hit the comms tonight for your mission. I’ll drop these off to legal on my way out. See you in a couple of hours.”

Those words floated behind her as she left his office. He could tell she was fighting tears and it killed him. He phoned Digg and asked him to follow her home discreetly. After Digg could meet him at Verdant. Oliver needed to get a workout in.

 

Felicity was due at Verdant in an hour and a half. Digg and Oliver had been training, but Digg called it quits when Oliver’s mind clearly wasn’t on the mats.

“What’s on your mind, man?” Digg scrubbed his face with a towel.

“I fucked up, Digg. I don’t know how to fix it.” Oliver sat on the training mats. If he was going to talk to Digg about this he might as well stay on the mats. Blood was easier to wipe off them than the floor and the equipment.

“Gonna tell me about it or should I start guessing? Guessing might take a while.” Digg took a seat a few feet away.

“I slept with Isobel in Russia.”

“I know. Is that all that is bothering you? I’ve never known you have to regrets before.” Digg clearly wasn’t impressed.

“How did you know? You were in prison?”

“QC grapevine. Besides Isobel was sure to mention it a few times in public places.”

“What a bitch.” The towel twisted in Oliver’s hands.

“I don’t think you are having regrets about Isobel. Was it an off night for you or does this have more to do with our bubbly IT tech who has lost her fizz?”

“I’ve made Felicity’s life hell, Digg. I was worried I couldn’t protect and it turns out I couldn’t. Only it wasn’t Arrow business that threatened her life. I managed to destroy her spirit.”

Digg nodded but didn’t say anything. Oliver surged to his feet to pace.

“If you know that Isobel and I slept together because of the grapevine, then you’ve probably heard the rumors about Felicity and I.”

“Yes, been since I’m almost always with you guys I never gave them much consideration. Should I have? Please, Oliver, please don’t tell me  you cheated on Felicity with Isobel.”

“No! Why would I do something like that? I’m done cheating.”

“Then what does Felicity have to do with this?”

Oliver paced like a caged animal while he laid out for Diggle all the details he knew. The vodka, the sex, the finding Felicity at his door, and their conversation after the fact.

“Well, it explains the past few weeks.”

“Is that all you have, Digg? I figured you would at least throw a punch or rip me a new one.”

“You’ve been doing a good job of that on your own. I do have a few questions though. When did you sleep with Isobel?”

“The night before we rendezvoused with you.” Oliver didn’t know why it mattered.

“Where was Felicity while you were getting your freak on with the ice queen?” Oliver flinched at the saying but Digg offered no apology.

“I couldn’t tell you.”

“I can.” Digg leveled him with a glare. “She was downing a pint of ice cream in her room. The container was still there when she let Lyla use her room to get cleaned up.”

Oliver didn’t know what to say to that.

“Man, you are an idiot. She probably was stuck to her tablet monitoring the situation. There might not have been much to monitor but she was going to in case something happened. It is what she does every time you disappear into the night and leave us down here. She gets ice cream and waits to hear from you.”

“I didn’t….” Oliver trailed off.

“Know? Yeah, I gathered.” Digg paused as if choosing his next words. “You showed up when and where we planned. As a soldier I had complete confidence in you. I don’t care what you did between my arrest and you being there. I have a problem with you leaving Felicity alone in a country she isn’t familiar with. Isobel didn’t need your attention. Felicity did. I bet you never noticed she chewed her nails down until they bled that night.”

Oliver’s pacing slowed.

“We are a team, Oliver, but we aren’t a unit. Felicity is not one of the guys. She isn’t trained to compartmentalize and handle situations like we are. Intellectually she knew she had to wait for the next phase. Knowing something and being able to accept it are two different things. I have faith in you as a brother-in-arms. Felicity probably needed some reassurance. Next question. Did you really not know about the rumors concerning the two of you?”

A hand made it way to the back of Oliver’s neck.

“Well, when did you find out?”

“Isobel accused me of arranging the trip for the two of us.”

“So the woman who accused you of sleeping with your assistant is the same woman you took to bed with you?” Digg shook his head. “Are you and Felicity going to work this out?”

“I don’t know what there is to work out? How do I fix this? I can’t transfer her back to IT. It’ll look like I grew bored with her and discarded her. She sits outside of my office so fucking miserable and I can’t do anything to cheer her up. If I let her go, Digg, I have to let her go completely. I’m not sure that is the answer either. I don’t think I can let her go.”

The sound of the security being disengaged signaled Felicity’s arrival.

“I wouldn’t make a decision for her, Oliver. I guarantee you won’t make the right one.”

Felicity came down the stairs. Looking between the two guys now staring at her, she offered a wave and then turned to her computers.

 

Friday morning a bouquet of flowers was delivered by security to Felicity’s desk. The elaborate bouquet was obviously expensive. Multiple varieties of rare flowers splashed color across her desk. She pulled the card off and read it. From his seat Oliver watched gauging her reaction. He wondered where they had come from. However, given her reaction she wasn’t surprised to see them.

“I need the rest of the afternoon off.” Felicity entered his office pulling at the ends of her sweater.

“Sure. Everything ok?”

“Yeah, I have an appointment this afternoon I forgot about.”

Oliver didn’t push her on the lie. He nodded and she offered a brief, genuine smile before rushing from his office to get her things. She snatched up the card, but left the flowers on the middle of her desk. She rushed onto the elevator Digg was just exiting from.

“What’s up with Felicity? You piss her off again?” Digg took a seat.

“No, can you track her phone? Those flowers came in and she rushed out of here.”

“You sure that is a good idea? If it is personal, we shouldn’t intrude.” Digg countered but had already pulled out his phone.

“Yes, I’m sure. I just want to make sure she is safe. Too much is going on right now and she isn’t sharing.”

“She’s probably worried if she does who you’ll share it with.”

 

When Oliver arrived at Verdant that evening with Digg, Felicity was already there. She was seated at her computers muttering to herself.

“You’re here early, girl.” Digg spoke up as they hit the bottom stair.

Startled Felicity let out a scream and flew out of her seat to turn and face them.

Oliver hung back but Digg moved forward quickly.

“You ok?”

“Yeah, just a lot on my mind. I must have been lost in thought because I didn’t hear the alarm. Since I get lost driving at least once a month, I’m not surprised I was lost in thought.”

Digg pushed her chair back to her with a grin. Oliver smiled at the usual verbal gush Felicity had just displayed.

“Lost in good thoughts?” Digg asked.

“Do you guys have a minute? Can we talk?”

The two boys both pulled chairs over to sit with her.

“In all the excitement of everything I guess, I forgot what today’s date was. Last year we weren’t nearly as far into it so I was prepared. This year I wasn’t and I didn’t have a chance to make a list. Every year Bruce Wayne sends me flowers. We met five years ago at a conference. I was new to QC and he offered me a job. I declined and he told me he wouldn’t give up. Every year we meet for lunch and he offers me a different position.”

Oliver and Digg looked at each while Felicity turned to grab the card off her keyboard. She slowly ran her finger over the BW engraving.

“Every year I meet with him. We order drinks and he says the same thing. ‘Felicity Smoak, I’d like to see you at Wayne Enterprises. I’m here to offer you a job.’ The actual position changes every year. Usually it doesn’t matter the title or the pay. I turn it down. He offers me more. I turn that down. We eat lunch and share some laughs. He’ll walk me to my car and try one more time. I’ll turn him down again. Either he is a glutton for punishment or he doesn’t fit the mold of most billionaire playboys. This year though I wasn’t ready and my rejection didn’t hold the usual conviction.”

Digg’s eyes grew wide and Oliver developed a scowl.

“I didn’t agree to anything but he managed to get me to commit to lunch again in a week.” She raised her head and looked at them. “I think I need to seriously consider his offer.”

“Girl, is this what you want?” Digg asked. Oliver had turned to stone.

“I don’t know what I want Digg. I’m fucked if I do; fucked if I don’t. Pardon my language. I like being a part of something special here with you two. However, up there I’m floundering. It isn’t even about being an executive assistant. My professional reputation is shot. Everyone believes that I sleep with Oliver Queen to advance my career. Do you know that Isobel Rochev has no business ties with Wayne Enterprises? Do you know how rare it is to find a company that has no ties to Isobel Rochev? She has recruited, fired, or screwed just about every executive within a 50 mile vicinity. I doubt she is willing to give me a glowing recommendation. Bruce Wayne has no affiliation, association, or care about Isobel Rochev. I’d get a clean slate.”

Digg nodded. At some point Oliver’s eyes had slid closed.

“However, I’d have to give up everything here. My apartment. My work with you guys. I’d be able to help but it would all be from a distance. My new position wouldn’t allow for me to work on new missions during daylight hours. There would be no sudden trips to Russia.” She stumbled on those words.

“You should take it.” Oliver took her silence to mean she wanted their input.

Felicity slowly nodded. Digg turned wide eyes on Oliver, but he held Felicity’s gaze until she dropped her eyes to the note on her lap.

“You don’t have to go, but if you want to go. It is your choice Felicity. You do what you have to in order to be happy.” Oliver stood up and disappeared towards the training mats.

“Well, I guess that is that.” Felicity turned to Digg. Her eyes had begun to fill with tears.

“It doesn’t have to be.” Digg pulled her in for a hug, lowering his head to whisper. “Don’t make a decision tonight. Think about it.”

Oliver suddenly appeared with his phone in his hand, “Bruce Wayne is upstairs. He asked Thea if I would be at the club tonight. Why don’t we take the night off.”

 

Oliver pushed his way through the crowded dance floor. It was a Friday which meant the party started early. He could see Bruce sitting in the VIP section. Thea sat across from him at the table for 2.

“Good timing, big brother, I was just telling Bruce you usually are a really late arrival on the weekends. The life of responsible CEO is leaving no time for partying.” Thea stood from the seat.

Oliver kissed his sister on the cheek and offered his hand to Bruce. Thea disappeared promising a waitress would bring drinks after Bruce requested vodka.

“How are you, Oliver? It looks like you’ve taken to life as a CEO relatively well.”

“It leaves less time for women, but it isn’t as bad as I once thought it was.”

A waitress brought two vodkas on a tray. As she placed them in front of the two men, she offered her most flirtatious smile. Both offered a smile in return but paid her no attention. Grabbing their drinks they lifted them in salute before downing them in one shot.

“Yes, well since we are speaking of women, I am here to talk about a rather appealing one. Felicity Smoak. I’ve been courting her for years. I was hoping to steal her away from QC and bring her to WE sooner than this.”

“What makes you think she wants to leave QC?”

“Come now, Oliver. She’s been demoted to executive assistant. I hear things. However, I also know her whether she realizes it or not. She wouldn’t take a position to sleep with you and she wouldn’t sleep with you to be given a position. Felicity can’t be bought. I learned during our first meeting.”

“Perhaps you weren’t offering her what she was really looking for.” Oliver nearly gagged as he issues the sexual innuendo.

“There is the old schoolmate I remember. Always thinking about his next lay or his last great lay. A woman of Felicity’s caliber is more than a sexual encounter. I dare say she is a drug. She has been to me at least. She gets under your skin and can make you forget every other woman.”

“Do you want her professionally or personally, Bruce? I’m confused. Are you scouting her professional skills or her personal skills? I’m not one who offers references.”

“You speak of her so cavalierly and yet you are clearly upset. I offered her a job this afternoon. I wanted you to know. In years past I didn’t think there was a possibility, but today I have more hope that she’ll relocate to Gotham. I just wanted you to know as a friend.”

“Were you hoping you’d receive my blessing? Any company would benefit greatly from having Felicity Smoak, however, I plan on keeping her at QC.” Oliver stood from his chair. He was finished with this faux pissing contest with Bruce.

“My experience with women has taught me that you allow them to make their decisions. You choose for her and you’ll definitely lose her, Queen.”

 

All weekend the team worked without mentioning Felicity’s job offer. Monday morning dawned and Oliver realized that they wouldn’t be able to ignore it. Bruce had asked Felicity to dinner on Wednesday night. There were things Oliver needed to say before Felicity made her decision.

Oliver entered his office followed by Digg. Digg carried two cups of coffee.

“I’ll be in with the security team if you need me.”

Five minutes later Felicity made her way in. She offered Oliver a tentative smile as she  hung her coat. Before she could take her seat he requested she join him.

“Good morning.” Felicity seated herself across from him.

“Morning.” He pulled one of the coffees out and handed it to her.

“Thank you.” Her brow furrowed as she took in his subdued manner and the coffee he’d given her.

“I want to say a few things before you make a decision about Bruce’s job offer.” He knew he was unsettling her with his professional tone, but he needed to make sure she understood his next words. “I don’t want you to take it. I really don’t want you to take it. I fucking hate the idea you are considering it.”

Wide eyes met his.

“I don’t know where we went wrong. Honestly, I think it has more to do than just the trip to Russia. It probably goes back to before the Undertaking.”

He moved to the front of his desk and sat next to her.

“Felicity, I am one royally fucked up man. There are so many things wrong with me that I try and make right what I can because the rest I’ve given up on. I wish I could tell you all that has made me this way, but I don’t want to. One of the things that I appreciate about you is your belief in the world. Your belief in me.”

“I need to protect you. I need to protect Digg. I need my mother and sister to never find about Team Arrow. I want to lock you up in the lair every time a threat comes because the thought of you getting hurt for me makes me lose my breath.”

“Yet, the one thing I haven’t done is consider you and your feelings. I transferred you to this floor because I needed you close. Yes, it makes working easier, but if I can see you then I know you are safe. I should have consulted you. I should have explained it to you better.”

“Oliver, I understand.” Felicity began in order to absolve him of his guilt but he stopped her.

“Please let me say this. I’ve been thinking of all the things I should have said all along and I don’t want to forget any of it.”

“It never occurred to me how badly my reputation could damage yours. I never thought people wouldn’t see you for the bright and capable employee you are instead of the playboy I am.”

“My decision to sleep with Isobel in Russia shouldn’t have had any bearing on how people view you, but I know it has. I was an ass, Felicity, I know you can’t understand why I slept with her. I can’t explain it really. Before the island I would sleep with whoever I wanted. It didn’t matter that supposedly Laurel and I were in a relationship. If Tommy and I went skiing in Vail, I slept with slope bunnies. If Tommy and I hit the beach, I slept with beach babes. I’m not excusing it, but I could have sex without strings and return to Starling City and be a boyfriend.”

“I was wrong then. I was really wrong this time. Tommy wasn’t with me in Russia for a good time. I was with you. I should have been with you, sharing the pint of ice cream. We could have been reviewing plans to reunite with Digg. I could have reassured you and prevented you from chewing off your fingertips. I could have taken you sightseeing to take your mind off things.”

“You scare me, Felicity Smoak. You managed to talk me down off the ledge so many times. I’ve taken from you time and time again and I’ve given you nothing in return. I want you to choose if you stay or if you go. I know a clean slate would ease some of your stress. I know walking through hallways where your co-workers aren’t gossiping about you would probably be a relief. Hell getting a good night’s sleep would probably be a pleasant change.”

“However, I don’t want you to go and I need you to know that. I can’t fix everything. Isobel isn’t going anywhere for the foreseeable future. No one can stop the gossip. I won’t always make the right choice and I can’t protect you from everything. I’ll do my damned best thought.”

Oliver sat back and waited. The silence between them grew.

“Am I allowed to talk now?”

With a wave of his hand, Oliver indicated the floor was hers.

“Wow! I thought I was the one with the word problem. Yes, there would be benefits to working with Bruce. More sleep would be fabulous. Less stress would be great because I’m a stress eater. Being able to stay up-to-date on my television shows would be miraculous.”

“However, there are things I would miss. I would miss knowing I contributed to the greater good of society. I’d get bored when I couldn’t hack some government agency. I’d have to get cats and name them Digg and Oliver to have someone in my life daily. I’d even miss getting you the random cup of coffee.”

“I needed to hear you say that you wanted me to stay. I’ll think it over tonight, but I wasn’t really looking to go anywhere.” Felicity smiled at him.

Tilting his head, Oliver considered her words. “What do you mean you needed to hear me say that I wanted you to stay?”

“You close yourself off to close relationships. Sometimes I think if you weren’t getting anything from me then I’d be the next part of your life relegated to the past. Digg and I may know your biggest secret, yet you still ran away.”

“I think it is easy for you to live a life on an island, self-sufficient and alone. I often wonder if you would have come back if I hadn’t shown up to force you. You know Digg was only there because someone had to push me out of the plane. Sometimes I think I made the mistake in bringing you back.”

“I meant what I said about you deserve to be happy. You keep choosing to sacrifice your happiness for others, but I think what you’re doing in the process is preventing others from being happy. You’ve chosen this martyrdom that is not only ridiculous but it over used in entertainment. Movies and TV shows are also trying to convince us the best part of a reluctant hero is his willingness to sacrifice his happiness.”

Oliver waited her out.

“If sleeping with Isobel makes you happy then I say go for it. Just please don’t do it in here where I might accidentally see something I don’t want to see from my desk. You can stop the gossip by getting a girlfriend. Even if it isn’t Isobel, my previous request remains valid. Glass walls and all.”

“However, if you are ready to send her packing then I have a present for you. I was going to leave it for you when I accepted Bruce’s job offer. I finished it last night. I didn’t want you to think I was giving you an ultimatum so I didn’t want you to have it while I was still here.”

“Felicity, what is it?”

“I’ve figured out a way to free QC from the evil reign of Isobel Rochev.”

 


End file.
